5 Networking Tips for Introverts
By Chantal Lovell, State Policy Network’s Director of Strategic Communications
My first State Policy Network Annual Meeting experience was and continues to be a complete blur.
If you’re anything like me, the idea of spending multiple days surrounded by over 1,000 peers is probably as exhausting as it is terrifying. Yet, thanks to sage advice from other introverts, combined with several years of practicing strategies that have equipped me to engage with dozens of people while remaining functional, Annual Meeting has become a week I look forward to all year.
Chaz Cirame, founder of Cc: External Affairs, recently reframed the idea of networking for me when he said, “networking is just building relationships.” I’m someone who would rather have a few significant relationships than many superficial ones, and this explanation finally made the concept of networking seem appealing.
It also helped me see that being introverted, a trait I’d always considered an impediment to networking, could actually be an advantage. Many of the best listeners I know are more introverted than not, and it’s these same people who, by their very nature, tend to develop deep and lasting relationships.
Use your inclination to listen to your advantage. While it’s important to be able to share a few things about yourself, it’s also crucial to refrain from dominating the conversation, or asking your new contact for something too early. Approach others with the mindset that you want to get to know them, learn about their work, and discuss mutual interests.
Investing time to prepare in advance of a big networking event can have an out sized payoff and minimize the toll of chit-chatting with numerous strangers and acquaintances.
When possible, do a little research into the other event attendees and organizations in attendance so you can use your limited energy focusing on these conference-goers in-person. This can trick your brain into feeling familiar with a person and make it easier to approach someone you’ve never met.
For large events like Annual Meeting, utilize the conference tools at your disposal. Be sure to join the SPN 26th Annual Meeting Facebook group, look at the attendee roster, and download and use the Annual Meeting app.
As you look through the attendees and organizations, narrow your focus by starting with people who work in the same field as you, and states that are of interest to you in some way.
Having a few conversation openers and topics in your back pocket can be a conference life saver. Introducing yourself, then asking someone where they work and what they do is the simplest way to get a conversation going, as is asking them about the sessions they’ve attended or plan to attend.
Take some of the pressure off yourself – you don’t have to carry the conversation, instead give another person the chance to talk. Be sure to have some open-ended questions ready – like, “tell me about your work” –to keep the conversation focused on the other person if you need to.
Just remember: networking isn’t about having hour-long conversations with a single person about a single topic. Doing this is a disadvantage to you both. Make your conversations meaningful but follow up later for the nitty gritty.
Networking can be particularly draining for introverts, having strategies to preserve and replenish your energy is one of the best things you can do to enjoy yourself during the week and get the most out of Annual Meeting.
It may feel awkward to interrupt the conversation to let someone know you have to leave, but it doesn’t need to be, and you shouldn’t waste any of your valuable energy stressing over this.
Having a session, meeting, dinner, or other event to head to are easy reasons to end a conversation. “I’ve really enjoyed meeting you. I’ve got a session I want to catch, so I’ve got to run” is a simple and polite way to signal your exit.
Of course, you’re inevitably going to encounter someone who doesn’t pause long enough to make the graceful exit, at which point, politely interrupting with an, “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I’ve got to get going. Let’s continue this conversation when we have more time” is your best strategy.
There will also be times you find yourself wanting to end a conversation with a person and start up a chat with another who is in eye-shot. Using similar wording to the phrases above can work here too, as can inviting the person you’re speaking with to join you in the new conversation. Try, “Oh, I see so-and-so, who I’ve been meaning to catch. I’ve got to excuse myself, but let’s chat again.”
Before you leave, be sure to ask a person for their business card and note you’ll be in touch. This is a great way to signal you’re interested and are leaving because of other constraints. Jotting down a few notes about the person on the back of the business card will make your follow-up easier and more impactful.
By their design, industry events and conferences like Annual Meeting bring together people who share interests and passions, so use this week as a time to talk about your latest research and ask someone about their biggest win over the year. Chances are, you’ll enjoy where the conversation goes.
Chantal Lovell is State Policy Network’s Director of Strategic Communications.
